


sink in

by orphan_account



Category: Wanna One (Band)
Genre: Fluff, Love Confessions, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-06-14
Updated: 2018-06-14
Packaged: 2019-05-23 06:23:14
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,525
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14928875
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account
Summary: Maybe Guanlin shouldn't have confessed.





	sink in

Guanlin likes rainy days. It's no surprise, really, considering his name means 'rainy season'. He likes the sun, too, most of the time he probably likes it more than the rain. But rainy days have their charm. When you can stay at home, they feel safe. Quiet, calm, relaxing. It's like the soft, steady hum of rain protects you from the world outside, the world that's too fast, unpredictable and too loud. Rainy days seem like you could whisper all your secrets and they would keep them.  


 

Maybe that's why Guanlin confessed to Jihoon on a rainy day. The rain lulled him into a sense of security. The sun wasn't watching, the world wasn't watching. It was just him and Jihoon, sharing a quiet moment as they sat together on the bed watching a drama on Jihoon's laptop. And the words just spilled from his lips. I like you hyung, plain and simple.  


 

Jihoon rejected him.  


 

He was silent for moment, before turning to Guanlin with an expression he couldn't decipher.  


 

"I'm sorry," he said, voice quiet.  


 

And Guanlin panicked. Because Jihoon sounded like he was for some reason responsible, like it was his fault that Guanlin was in one-sided love. Just like Jihoon to be protective of his friends to the point of blaming himself for something he couldn't control.  


 

But it was all Guanlin's fault. He was stupid to have hope, he shouldn't have said anything. He assured Jihoon that it was fine, that it was not a big deal. But his voice was shaking and Jihoon probably could see right through him. Since that day, things between them have been quite awkward.  


 

This is why Guanlin doesn't really trust rainy days anymore. Even if he still likes them, he wishes his name meant something else.  


 

Today it's raining too.  


 

It's Wednesday and Guanlin is alone in the apartment. Jihoon left somewhere; maybe to meet up with Woojin or maybe to drink and play games with Daniel. Maybe on a date with Yoojung, a cute girl he seemed very close to. Jihoon is surrounded by beautiful people who adore him. Guanlin was stupid to think he had a chance.  


 

Usually on Wednesdays he and Jihoon watch a movie together. It's like an unspoken tradition- or rather was, before Guanlin confessed. Of course even before one of them cancelled sometimes when something else came up. It wasn't a big deal. It shouldn't be a big deal today too, but when Jihoon gave him a tense smile and told him he was going out, Guanlin felt especially sad.  


 

It's his birthday today.  


 

It's not like he was forgotten. He got wishes from his parents and from his friends and judging by the weird way Seonho and Shuhua have been acting in school, Guanlin is pretty sure they're planning a party for him on the weekend. And that's all nice but the fact that Jihoon forgot still hurts. In the end, Guanlin loves him. And they live together, for fuck's sake.  


 

But maybe that will change soon. Maybe Jihoon wants to change roommates. Guanlin only lives here because Daniel wanted to move in with his boyfriend. Seongwoo, Daniel's boyfriend, was tutoring Guanlin online before Guanlin came here and he arranged everything.  
But Jihoon has people he's much closer to, doesn't he. Maybe he wants Woojin to move in here?  


 

Guanlin sighs. His mind is sure full of bright and happy thoughts today. He stares and his textbook, his mind completely blank. He's been trying to study but he just can't focus. He wishes Jihoon was here. If only Guanlin didn't make things awkward...  


 

He puts the textbook away and wraps his arms around his legs. This sucks. He likes Jihoon so much. He's ambitious, hardworking, determined, strong and kind. He's been so nice to Guanlin all this time. But Guanlin just had to mess things up with his dumb feelings.  


 

He sniffs, feeling his eyes sting. It's been so long since he cried but he's feeling especially gloom today. It's pathetic, really. He didn't cry when he moved to Seoul alone, didn't cry when he struggled with Korean, when he thought he'd never make friends here, when he missed his parents. But now he's close to tears because a boy doesn't like him back.  


 

Being in love sucks, he decides. Even so, he doesn't want to stop. Why?  


 

"Guanlin?" The sound of Jihoon's voice startles him. He didn't even hear the front door open. His heart jumps in his chest as he quickly wipes his eyes with his sleeve. He doesn't quite trust his voice to respond. "Lin-ah?" Jihoon knocks lightly at the ajar door before pushing it open and entering Guanlin's room.  


 

"Hey," he greets him with a smile. It quickly fades away once he takes a closer look at Guanlin's face. Shit. He didn't really cry, it shouldn't be obvious. "Linlin, are you okay?"  


 

The nickname makes Guanlin's heart clench. He tries his best to smile.  


 

"I'm fine, just tired."  


 

At least his voice comes out steady. But Jihoon doesn't look convinced. He comes closer and sits on the edge of Guanlin's bed, examining his face. Guanlin avoids his eyes. But of course Jihoon won't have it.  


 

"Hey, look at me," he says softly. Then a little harsher, "Guanlin, look at me." It's that tone even Seongwoo and Daniel are intimidated by. So Guanlin obeys. Jihoon is frowning but he doesn't look upset, just concerned. "Is anything bothering you?"  


 

It'd be easy to just shake his head and lie again, say that he's okay. But Guanlin is an honest person, sometimes to a fault. And he just can't do that when Jihoon is looking at him like that.  


 

"I just… I'm sorry, hyung. For making things difficult for you. If-if you don't want to be around me now, I understand, I just…" he pauses. He doesn't want Jihoon to know how much he misses him, it'd just trouble him further. His heart aches but he doesn't want to be a burden. He hates it. "I'm sorry."  


 

Jihoon's eyes widen. "I don't- you don't need to apologize."  


 

"But I… I just made things awkward…"  


 

"No, Lin-ah." Jihoon takes Guanlin's hand in his. His hands are smaller than Guanlin's but the grip feels strong, secure. Sincere. "Shit, I should have talked to you earlier. But I wanted to be sure… Lin, you know I'm awkward with feelings."  


 

Guanlin stares at him, not understanding. Jihoon… his face is red. Is he embarrassed?  


 

"I… was worried I'd hurt you. You're really honest. About the way you feel. And I…" He sighs. "I was scared I'd fuck up. You deserve better than that, you know."  


 

"Hyung, what are you…"  


 

Jihoon gives him a tight smile. "I've got something for you." He pulls something out of his denim jacket pocket and then- he's slipping it onto Guanlin's finger. Guanlin stares. It's a simple black band. It's pretty.  


 

"This is…?"  


 

"To match mine." Jihoon raises his hand- he has a matching ring on his index finger. "If you… still want to, of course. To date me."  


 

"Huh?" Guanlin gapes, trying to process what just happened. Did Jihoon ask him out? By buying matching rings? Is he dreaming? "Hyung so you- you like me too?"  


 

"Yeah." Jihoon smiles, ruffling Guanlin's hair. "Who wouldn't like you, you idiot."  


 

The tender gesture and the warmth in Jihoon's voice make Guanlin smile. And then it finally hits him- it's really happening. Jihoon really likes him. He grins happily and wraps his arms around Jihoon, hugging him close.  


 

"I like you so much, hyung," he mumbles, still a little overwhelmed. Jihoon laughs; he sounds embarrassed. The way he pats Guanlin's back is a bit awkward, but Guanlin doesn't mind.  


 

"Happy birthday, by the way," Jihoon says, voice soft. "I got you a cake, it's in the kitchen. So let me go and let's go eat."  


 

Guanlin just hugs him tighter. "I will never let you go, hyung."  


 

"What if it's an ice cream cake?"  


 

That convinces Guanlin. He pulls back and he's ready to go to the kitchen but Jihoon is not moving off the bed. Instead he cups Guanlin's face and leans in closer. Guanlin is once again amazed by how pretty he is. It's not why he likes Jihoon but there's no denying it; Jihoon is really beautiful.  


 

"Can I kiss you?" Guanlin was just thinking how cute it was that Jihoon blushed so much- but now he's sure his face must be completely red too. The question caught him off guard. Of course, he thought about it before. How it'd feel like to kiss Jihoon. But also, he's never kissed anyone before.  


 

"Yeah."  


 

And then Jihoon leans in even closer and Guanlin closes his eyes. As their lips meet, Guanlin realizes it's still raining, his heartbeat is thumping in his ears but he can hear the steady drip of rain in the silence.  


 

He was so worried about his relationship with Jihoon but everything turned out well. It's still hard to believe it but it feels real. Jihoon's soft lips on his feel real.  


 

Maybe rainy days are his lucky days after all.  


 

**Author's Note:**

> i want to write a long panwink fic so this is like, a warm up. i hope i wrote them well enough. i know it's nothing special but i hope someone likes it!


End file.
